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Thread: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"


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Permlink Replies: 88 - Pages: 6 [ Previous | 1 2 3 4 5 6 | Next ] - Last Post: May 14, 2013 5:19 PM Last Post By: lwards
Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 5:41 AM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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Rude people get no where in life...
Malcolm Higgins

Posts: 15
Registered: 04/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 5:56 AM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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Marquis Mills What is your first language?
Only, Rude people get no where in life...
Should read…
Rude people get nowhere in life...
landdk

Posts: 126
Registered: 12/21/11
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 6:04 AM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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"do it in a professional way" So... just exactly what would be the "professional way" to call somebody a "rude bastard" after they made an attempt to help you?

(I hope I have asked this question in a "professional way".)
Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 6:19 AM   in response to: landdk in response to: landdk
 
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Malcolm I thought you were done and for the new blogger, don't attack me without understanding the situation.
Kara Haskins

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Registered: 11/13/12
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 9:39 AM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
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I haven't done the 'look inside' as I see a few names on here who have already commented who I know to have good heads on their shoulders, so I won't comment on it structurally as you've been given that advice already.

As was pointed out- yes, your cover is incorrectly formatted for an ebook lisiting. Why does it matter? Because it makes you look like a hack. It's about as bad as juts putting up an image with no title or author name. It's amateur, and gives possible readers a bad impression.

You have a 110 page book priced at $9.99. If you fixed the things mentioned above, and priced it competitively at, say, $2.99 or $3.99, you'd most likely get far more sales, and some reviews would follow. Why do you expect folks to pay $10 for a work from an 'unknown' when they can have their pick of other books that interest them for less than half the price? Something to think about...

You'll also find that calling other users on here names is a sure-fire way to need help, ask for it, and find that no one answers you anymore.
Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 10:49 AM   in response to: Kara Haskins in response to: Kara Haskins
 
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I appreciate your criticism but your friends too it to another level but you on the other gave me what I wanted.

Thank you very much for answering my question without disrespecting me.

:)

Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 10:51 AM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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I had no clue that I overpriced it.
andresanthomas

Posts: 4,998
Registered: 01/01/12
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 11:25 AM   in response to: crazywriterlady in response to: crazywriterlady
 
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This is not the special snowflake forum.

I'm am so going to get that on a t-shirt one day.
gldrummond

Posts: 4,734
Registered: 05/08/09
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 3:43 PM   in response to: andresanthomas in response to: andresanthomas
 
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Me too, LOL.
booknookbiz

Posts: 4,183
Registered: 03/04/10
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 4:30 PM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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Marquis:

You've been extremely disturbed by the criticism you've requested in this forum, so, before I post, I'm going to ask you this: do you or do you not want an honest critique? Before I owned the company I own now, which is an ebook formatting/conversion service, I was a book reviewer for Sphere (fantasy and sci-fi), in the early 90's. So: do you want an honest critique, or are you only interested in hearing what you want to hear? I'll tell you what I think, but I'm not going to do so if you are solely giving lip-service to the idea of honest criticism. I'll warn you in advance: this book needs a ton of work. If you're interested in hearing what I have to say, I'll say it. If not, I won't waste my time. Your choice.
Hitch
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76year2

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Registered: 11/29/11
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 7:41 PM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
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I read your look inside and liked it, your price is good. And your cover looks good, I don't know about the size is all. I'm not a reviewer and right now don't have time to read much. Every new writer I've seen here get the same treatment you have got. So take it on the chin and just look at your book again and if you feel it is good laugh it off and be happy you can. Mine may not be so good, but their is some who like them and that's all that maters to me.

Edited by: 76year2 on May 7, 2013 7:41 PM
Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 8:34 PM   in response to: 76year2 in response to: 76year2
 
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Agreed. If they don't like the book, they don't and everyone has a different writing style.

Yes I had typos in it, a mistake which I thought I fixed before posting it . But a lot love the story so I'm not taking anything to heart some of these bloggers say.

gldrummond

Posts: 4,734
Registered: 05/08/09
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 8:39 PM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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Testing...

Ah, it posted. Cool.

While some of the members here may be bloggers, they're also authors and publishers.

I believe you stated that you've only had one sale of this book, and its ranking is below a million, indicating that's the only sale of it. You asked for help.

Your book didn't have just a couple of typos.

From the Look Inside:

"A young woman stands on the edge a large black rock protruding from the ocean, staring at the sunset." - At the very least, there's a missing "of" in that sentence, between "edge" and "a".

"She is athletic and curvy who has beautiful brown skin..." - Removing the "who has" and replacing it with "with" would help that sentence make far better sense.

You don't use quotes to indicate dialogue at all. That's going to be really, really off-putting to most readers, who are accustomed to dialogue being contained with quotes.

"She joined the military at a very young age, just barely past adolescent." - "Adolescence" would be the correct word in that particular sentence.

"...tide tightly by brown rope." - "Tied". A 'tide" is the rise and fall of sea levels.

Those are just a very few of the things I noticed. There are many others, and I think it's probably pretty safe to say that's why your book isn't selling.

Edited by: gldrummond on May 7, 2013 8:39 PM
Marquis Mills

Posts: 37
Registered: 05/06/13
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 8:41 PM   in response to: booknookbiz in response to: booknookbiz
 
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Not being rude but my answer was answered above. Again there is a difference between criticism and making rude responses.

Problems were fixed and now it's good to go.

Yes you are a professional and know your stuff but I just wanted to tell a story that is a good story.

Criticism is some times bias for it all depends on the audience.

Also if you are going to make a comment such as my book needs tone of work, read it first and then I will respect your opinion but I can't because you have not read it but assume based on a few errors shown in the sample.

Edited by: Marquis Mills on May 7, 2013 8:45 PM

gldrummond

Posts: 4,734
Registered: 05/08/09
Re: I need a Review for "Island of Yoi"
Posted: May 7, 2013 8:59 PM   in response to: Marquis Mills in response to: Marquis Mills
 
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Well, there's your answer, Hitch. ;)

Good luck with your sales, Marquis. :)
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